Living amends

I got nothin' today. Or, it went mostly on paper as I made my first attempt at the 8th step, writing down some names. I didn't dig too deep! It was still an "ah, me" sort of day, contented and relaxing.

My sponsor Corvus suggests I plan to return home to Ioway on my first anniversary. To do an "amends trip", he said. I am still literally afraid of taking a long road trip, especially there, but we have a friend from near Oakapaloka and he makes the trip every month or so. Corvus has a lot of good ideas.

I have amends to make to my maternal grandmother. He suggested visiting her grave, cleaning it up and making it pretty with flowers, then perhaps just sit there awhile and write her a letter.

Thinking of that makes me realize I have some emotions coming back. Complex almost. Time to weep, that'll be. Pretty sure I will.

The chef mondial is preparing me some chops. I must go make sure he isn't blogging at the same time.
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My mother visits in May. She thinks I live in some sort of religious order. Where she got the idea, is anyone's easy guess. I sort of do. Come on.